He who loves his wife loves himself.

Ephesians 5:28

Phil and Vera should have been the ideal couple. Phil thought he was perfect, and  Vera knew she wasn’t. Both of them thought they deserved sainthood-she for her humility, and he for his righteousness. They had been married for twenty-five years when they came for marriage counseling. Their insecurities had kept them from deeply loving themselves or each other.

Phil finally figured out that his righteousness cover was hiding an insecure little boy who never felt quite good enough. That’s why he spent much of his life trying to convince himself and the world that he was great. He had to learn that his true righteousness could come only with Christ, who would accept him as the sinner he was.

Vera also had much to learn. Her humility, she found out, came not from a servant’s heart but from a masochistic need to suffer so that people would admire her for her martyrdom. She had looked down on Phil for his egotism, but now she had to confess the pride she took in her humility. She asked God to forgive her and help her to take healthy pride in being the person He wanted her to become.

Vera and Phil know their sainthood will only  be achieved through Christ, who truly was and is perfect. Secure in Him, they can now know the beginnings of genuine love.

Prayer:  Lord, help me accept the real me and love others better.